Dearest,
You must feel so honored that the
General called upon you for consultation! What did you both speak of and what’s
the army’s next move? Seymour has been very good lately. Loretta, Benjamin and
I brought him to the circus that came into town and he was so well behaved. He
only shouted profanity at the filthy help that was mistreating the fragile
creatures. Oh but love you should have seen the attractions! There was a woman
with a beard longer than my father’s! I spoke to her after the performance
because I was so impressed. She explained to me that she has sought out to blur
the lines between male and female—she has a vagina but she urinates standing
up! I almost asked her to teach me but Loretta, Benjamin and Seymour were
awaiting me in the carriage. Well sweet dove, I am off to knit and read latin.
P.S. I've included a tin type of the bearded lady. Fascinating, isn't it?
With
passion, your urinating, pardon, yearning love,
Muffy
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